Cutting Your Emotional Ties To Fashion - Applying Stoic Principles to Clothing Attachments

Understanding Stoic Philosophy:

So first, let me get all teacher on you with some background. Stoicism, founded by Zeno of Citium in the 3rd century BC, teaches that individuals can achieve happiness and inner peace by living in harmony with nature, embracing virtue, and detaching themselves from external things that are beyond their control. The Stoics emphasized the distinction between what is within our power (our thoughts, choices, and actions) and what lies outside our control (external events and circumstances).

The principle of Stoic detachment encourages us to lessen our reliance on external things for happiness, cultivating inner contentment instead. When applied to our relationship with clothing, this principle holds immense transformative potential. It may seem counterintuitive for a fashion based newsletter to speak about detaching yourself from the desire from clothes. But I believe, it’s actually the key to success with our personal style. Let's dive deeper into the ways Stoicism can guide us toward a more balanced approach to fashion.

Applying Stoic Principles to Clothing Attachments:

1. Recognizing Impermanence:

Remember that time you lost your favorite sweater. Maybe you left it at that party, maybe your friend never returned it or it was simply kidnapped by those sneaky washing machine elves. Were you devastated or actually had forgotten about it until I brought it up just now?

Stoicism teaches us that everything in life is impermanent, including our material possessions. Clothing, like all external things, will eventually wear out or be lost. By acknowledging the impermanence of fashion trends and garments, we can avoid becoming overly attached or taking it all too seriously.

Now don’t get me wrong, I place a large amount of value on my clothing and do think we should have a respectful relationship with each piece. But as a tool to express ourselves, not as something to define us.

2. Practicing Contentment:

Do you constantly lust after a pair of shoes you see on a stranger, or toss and turn at night because of a cute sweater you saw that was out of your price range, or go way out of your way to justify that new pair of jeans that really have no business coming in to your denim stacked closet?……no?….just me?

Stoics emphasize the importance of finding contentment in the present moment and accepting what life offers. Applying this principle to fashion, we can learn to be content with our current wardrobe choices rather than constantly seeking new pieces to fill perceived gaps. By appreciating what we already have, we can reduce the desire for excessive consumption and find joy in the simplicity of our current wardrobe.

Even though I’d say most days I’m quite content with my wardrobe. I still struggle with this at times. Especially at the seasonal changes. So just know you’re not alone. Nobody is perfect when it comes to lusting for more clothes. But when we actively work on contentment, being content with our wardrobes happens most of the time. Which allows for us to be more creative because we reconfigure our perspective of our pieces rather than give up on them.

3. Detaching from Social Validation:

Have you ever been soooo excited about an outfit that you feel so inclined to take a picture of it? And then feel an even further impulse to post that picture on to some of form of social media. After, you wait breathlessly to see the likes, hearts, thumbs ups come flooding in…….only to be disappointed with the trickle of appreciation from only close acquaintances who would ‘like’ a photo of a stapler if you posted it? And because of that, it makes you question this epic outfit THAT YOU LOVED SO MUCH!!!!!!……no?…..again, just me?

In the age of social media and constant comparison, it is easy to seek external validation through our clothing choices. Stoicism teaches us to detach from the opinions of others and focus on our internal values. By dressing according to our own sense of style and identity, rather than seeking approval from others, we can find greater authenticity and confidence in our clothing.

4. Accepting the Uncontrollable:

When skinny jeans came back into the picture years ago, I absolutely re-freakin-fused to wear them. Then, when they arrived on the trends lists….what did I do?…bought 3 pairs over night. Now, that’s sort of a bad example because I ended up loving skinny jeans, but it makes my point….I allowed what I chose to wear to be dictated by a made up trends list that I had no control over. Only so that I could potentially impress others whose opinions I also had no control over.

Stoics believe that the only things within our control are our thoughts, choices, and actions. External events, such as fashion trends or the opinions of others, are beyond our control. By accepting this reality, we can detach ourselves from the desire for external validation and find greater peace in our clothing choices.

5. Gratitude for Clothing's Functionality:

I remember the first time I received something from Everlane. It arrived in a sleek minimalist box. I cut it at the edges of the box and slowly opened it to reveal a tissue wrapped long black puffer coat. As I pulled it out I could feel the weight of quality and craftsmanship. After unfolding it I ran my fingers over the taught stitching and then the structured yet smooth fabric. Finally, trying it on for the first time, again feeling the weight of the quality materials. Satisfying is the word that comes to mind when trying to describe the feeling. The contemporary silhouette igniting my excitement to style it immediately and present it out into the public. Once outside, I felt the comfort of warmth even when the cold air tried to invade. It was exceptional in style as well as function. I loved that coat….I appreciated that coat. Five years later….I love that coat…I appreciate that coat.

Stoicism encourages gratitude for the basic necessities of life. Clothing serves a practical purpose, protecting us from the elements and allowing us to express ourselves. By appreciating the functional aspect of clothing, we can shift our focus from acquiring more, more, more and rather cherishing the exceptional ones we have.

Conclusion:

Fashion detachment, inspired by Stoic philosophy, offers a pathway to a healthier and more mindful relationship with our clothing. By acknowledging the impermanence of fashion trends, practicing contentment, detaching from social validation, gratitude, and accepting the uncontrollable, we can find greater peace and authenticity in our personal style.

Early in my career I worked for one of the most well known action sports apparel brands. They operated at a very high volume and had a lot of pressures to stay ahead in the industry. But at the end of the day their corporate memo to their employees was always “We’re not saving lives, we just make clothes.” They wanted to make it apparent that even they knew, that clothes are not that serious. Clothes are simply a tool, a material. Much like a painter’s brush and paints, they express what we want to say. But even the painter will say, it’s not the brush and paints that define them as an artist….